I am here to be seen.

Have you ever felt like you wanted to be invisible so no one can see you? Where it is easier to blend into the woodwork and hide?

“I am here to be seen.”  I could hear those words coming from my own mouth, but my voice cracked and got real small.

One of the first activities Robert Holden shared with me and 87 other coaches this past July at the University of Santa Monica Soul-Centered Coaching Lab, was to partner with someone and say these words.  And their response was, “I see you.” Each morning we spent about 5 minutes partnering with different people to speak both of these messages and show that we were present and open to be seen.

Robert guided us each of our 5 days through this activity to begin our day of learning with him.

“I am here to be seen” and “I see you.”

Here is 7 year old Chrissy 🙂

After realizing how “small” my voice became, I focused and shifted my energy to be strong, confident and present. I felt a powerful shift inside myself. And yet……

…….this small voice was not to be ignored.  Whose small voice was this?  Whose voice was struggling with being seen?

It was my little girl. It was little Chrissy.  She was hesitant about being seen. Her belief was that if you are seen, then people will make fun of you.

With the help of my coach and doing some self-inquiries, I discovered that my sweet 7 year old experienced a little trauma that shut  her down and created a fear about “being seen.”

I remember being in the 2nd grade and our teacher was introducing us to oral reports. I was so excited about this experience that I raised my hand and said I wanted to go first the next day.

Right away I knew that I wanted to do a report on a flower that intrigued me.  I went home with so much energy inside to find out facts about this flower so I could share in my report.

So the next day, I was loaded with enthusiasm and excitement.

I was first to share and then sat down with a huge smile on my face.  However, after I listened to each report by the other students, my excitement diminished.

Everyone else’s reports were better than mine.  Mine was boring in comparison.

Yes, I compared their reports to mine and it was no longer special and exciting. I was embarrassed and ashamed of my work.

chrissy 7 yrs

Sweet little Chrissy 🙂

In my 7 year old mind, I compared my work to others and it wasn’t good enough.

In my 7 year old mind, I created separation.

In my 7 year old mind, the other kids were better and smarter than me.

I experienced comparison and then separation.

The message I created in my 7 year old mind was, “Don’t raise your hand, you will embarrass yourself; Your work isn’t as good at the other kids; It’s better to not be seen than be embarrassed”

This stuck with me for a long time. I learned how to hide in the woodwork  and not be seen. That was easier and safe.

Isn’t it interesting to see how the perception of a small child can create a belief that stays with them through their adult life?

Can you relate to judging yourself as not being good enough and comparing yourself to others?

Fast forward to the present:

I’ve spent the past 6 years growing my coaching/consulting practice and “being seen” in front of many groups.  I still get squeamish and nervous when I get in front of a crowd.  And yes, my voice cracks sometimes.

I have been working on healing those little wounds and changing my beliefs around being seen.

I have done some inner work with little Chrissy to let her know that its ok to been seen.  There is nothing to fear or be embarrassed about.

I let her know that what she has to say and share with the world, matters.

I let her know that she is learning and sometimes that means failing and trying again.

I let her know that she is loved and she doesn’t have anything to fear.

I’m the adult and I will be seen for both of us.

She is part of me, and as I’m healing this part of me, I can own my power and my grace to be seen.

Sometimes it is the little traumas that we don’t realize are getting in our way.

When your little one gets in the way of your success, it is time to take a look at who is really showing up in your life.

Ask yourself this question…….Is it your adult, or your little one, who is blocking your success? 

Here I am posing on the big stage at the eWomenNetwork Conference!

Here I am posing on the big stage at the eWomenNetwork Conference!

Fast forward to today:

I am being guided to make a bigger presence and bigger impact to share my message to bigger groups. I met an amazing speaker coach at the eWomenNetwork International Conference in August who is helping me strengthen my skills as a professional speaker and messenger.

I am standing in MY truth and sharing with the world my message about living consciously and creating more peace, love and equanimity in our lives.

I am standing in MY truth and teaching practical tools to women and men, about how to eliminate their self imposed suffering with worry, anxiety, fear and anger.

I am standing in MY truth and doing my own inner work and be the change I want to see in the world.

I am standing in MY truth to learn, grow and evolve as a professional coach, trainer AND speaker to share my message  with the world.

Can you relate to my story either as a child or an adult? Where are you hiding in your life?

I am here to be seen. And I see you.

With much love and gratitude,

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Your Resolutions….the Secrets to Keeping Them

Are you excited about the newness of 2012?  Have you already made some resolutions and began practicing them? Does it feel good?  Do you want to keep that good feeling and make those changes permanent and not just a memory when March rolls around?

Here are a few of my secrets for creating goals/intentions to change behaviors that can move you in the direction of the goals you want to achieve.  The New Year is a good time to begin, but you can create change any day of the year.

1.  Be realistic with your intentions/goals.  If you want to loose 20 pounds, you need a plan to assist you.  Maybe your goal is manage your food intake and increase your exercise.  Track your food and track your exercise.  The weight will come off based upon your body age, shape and size.

2. Take small steps with your goals/intentions. Break up the big goal into manageable pieces so that the task at hand is not too daunting.  Say you want to learn to paint.  Break up the goals into steps….I will research painting techniques online….I will research painting classes in my area….I will enroll in a class…..I will purchase my materials….

3. Write down your goals/intentions. Just the kinesthetic act of writing this information down activates it into your consciousness and makes it more real instead of just thinking about it.  You also send a message to the Universe about what your desire and commitment is.

4. Acknowledge yourself when you achieve your successes, even the small ones. It is very powerful to have positive thoughts about yourself and the actions you take to achieve your successes.  Saying kind and loving things to yourself activates the positive energy within your mind and body….creating wellness within You.

5. Let go of what is no longer serving you. If something is not bringing value to yourself, whether it is thoughts, feelings, relationships, habits…let them go and release them so that they don’t drain your positive energy.  Write on a piece of paper any negative thoughts or feelings you have inside of you and burn the paper.  Release it from your Self.  Once again, the kinesthetic act of writing releases the negative energy from your body.  Don’t read it after you write it…just crumple it and safely burn it!

6. Have a support network. Whether it is a coach, counselor, friend, loved one…someone you can share you intentions/goals with who will support and love you along the way.  The more people in your support network, the more people you can turn to when you need assistance.

7. Watch as your positive steps become good habits. The more you change your thoughts, behaviors and actions, the more likely they just become part of your everyday life.  Embrace the change in you and your life!!

The New Year is upon us and a wonderful time for Self reflection and change.  You have the power to manifest anything you want in your life.  Be kind to yourself and remember that all change happens only one day at a time, one moment at a time. You are the greatest gift you can give yourself so begin today, right now.  Embrace this moment and celebrate YOU!!

 

The Power of Intentional Living

You may not realize how powerful your thoughts and ideas are within your world.  Every thought that you have in your brain sends a message to yourself about your reality and moves into your consciousness.  It becomes your reality, positive or negative.

So what would it look like if you have positive thoughts and direction about what you want your life to be like?  This is intention.  Webster’s Dictionary defines “intention” as, “A determination to act in a certain way.”  Intention allows you to focus your attention on what you want to create.

Change your thoughts, energy and actions towards your intention.  This is when you can utilize the power within you. Your personal power, not your ego power.  This is the power that comes from deep within your heart and soul.  When you set your intentions of how you want to be and what you want in your life, you create the blueprint.  Intentions…

…are your personal power.

…are your ownership of your life.

…are your commitment.

…allow you to see the vision.

…precede and inspire vision.

…live between potential and action.

In addition to thinking about what you want, you can activate more energy when you write your intentions down with pen and paper.  Visualize yourself in that space of your intentions.  See yourself moving through it.  How does it feel in your visualization?   Make it come alive within your consciousness.   The more senses you use during these activities just increases the positive energy.  When you are doing these activities you are telling the Universe what you desire and see in your future.

Only then, is the challenging step with intentions.  You must surrender your ego attachment to it and release it to the Universe. If it is in your highest good to manifest, it will show up in your life.  Pay attention to the signs and synchronicities around you.  This is when you realize that you are not alone and your intentions are co-created with Spirit.  Trust and allow Spirit to move through you.

Through the power of intentions, you have the ability to create the life you truly desire.