Asleep at the Wheel of Life

Is your life on autopilot? Do you move through the motions to make it through each day?

Do you get up, take care of your family, go to work, take care of everyone and everything at work, come home at the end of the day and take care of everyone and everything AGAIN…then crash at the end of the day? 

Does this sound familiar? You might be asleep at the wheel of life.asleep-at-the-wheel-commercial

Here are some other indicators that you might be asleep:

  • Everyone else comes first and you are last on your list.
  • You find yourself bitter, angry and resentful because no one helps you.
  • You keep doing more, hoping for happiness.
  • You “forget” about your self care.
  • You feel like life is passing you by.
  • You have no energy.
  • You feel like you are living a lie.

I know what it is like, because I was asleep at the wheel of my own life.

Not too long ago I was living the life I thought was planned out for me. I had my personal and professional life in order…or so I thought.

I made it look good on the outside with my smile and my mask of happiness. On the inside, I was lost and empty.

I didn’t see the dysfunction I was immersed in. I didn’t see the crazy behavior I was a part of. I didn’t see how unhealthy my choices were. I didn’t see that there were options to find peace and happiness. I was too afraid to look at my own life.

Have you ever felt this insanity too?

It took the 2×4 of crisis for me to slow down and take that deep honest look at my life. Once I began the process of waking up, I saw that the more I healed my inner world, then my outer world began to shift. After a decade of inner transformation myself, now I support women and men to wake up to their lives!

honor yourselfIt is time to wake up.

If you feel an inner calling to awaken to your life, the time is now!

I have a 5 step process that will support you:

  1. Slow down.  Create quiet time every day just for yourself and your inner reflection. This could be a morning meditation, prayer, journaling or all of the above.
  2. Become aware of your life. Pay attention to what disturbs your peace. What upsets you…and why? What brings you joy…and why? Be curious, without judgment, to all of your life.
  3. Choose what honors you and your highest good. In the space of awareness of your life, now you can make the choice to let go of the old behaviors, habits and patterns that don’t serve you. You can simultaneously choose to bring more joy and upliftment into your life.
  4. Take action. Every step you take in the awakening process can be exciting AND fear filled. Take action anyways! Taking action despite the fear is called courage. Take one step at a time to honor yourself. Feel the feelings before, during and after each action step. Resistance might show up and know that it is a normal process. Inquire inside about the resistance (which is usually fear) and continue taking action.
  5. Create support structures. Waking up to your life requires support. This can be family, friends, therapists, coaches, communities in addition to asking for support from God (Spirit, Universe, Creator, Source…whatever fits for you) and other spiritual resources.

A decade ago I couldn’t have guessed where I would be today in my life, relationships and career. Because of my own awakening to my life, I have created the life and work of my dreams! I continue to be keenly aware in my life and move to a place of peace much quicker than I may have in the past.

The more I continue to do my inner work, I can take my clients that that deep place of healing as well.

I feel so blessed to share my gifts to support others moving through their awakening. As they wake up, then they become the mentors and role models for others in their life.

As each one of us awakens, we expand the ripple effect of light and illumination to the world.

Hand Made Heart HD Wallpaper

If you feel like this is your time to wake up, I invite you to call me. I would love to support you and your awakening. The time is now!

Much love,

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Skipping Over The Pain

Who wants to feel pain?  If you hurt yourself physically such as spraining your ankle, you take a pain reliever….right? You eliminate the pain and suffering. It helps you tolerate the pain and still get on with life.

Yet what happens when you feel emotional pain?

Do you automatically take a pain reliever? A pain reliever for emotional pain might be…

…avoidance.no pain

…busyness.

…justification.

…alcohol or drugs.

…any combination of these “pain relievers” listed above.

Again, who wants to feel pain?

Not too long ago, I was an expert at skipping over my own pain.

My feelings of anger, resentment and bitterness were pushed down with avoidance and busyness.  I even created a story that justified my actions.  No one knew how often I shoved down my upset feelings.

I just kept plugging away at my life and skipping over my pain.

Seriously I was so good at skipping over any pain. I was also the one who took ibuprofen and cold medicine at the first sign of physical pain or illness.  I didn’t have time for the pain.

What I didn’t see was the manifestation of my actions. It was adding to my stress and anxiety in life. I was totally drained physically and actually moved to a place of numbness in my emotions.

emotions4I was so numb, I wasn’t even aware when I skipped the pain. My actions had become unconscious.

Until I finally had hit my threshold of silent suffering and asked for help.

When I first started seeing my therapist, she could see how numb I was. I had stuffed my anger and put on my big smile (my mask) so long it took a while before I could feel the anger and upset.

Needless to say, she and I worked together to help me feel the anger and release it in a safe way.  Pillows, plastic bats, yelling and screaming…I got so much out!

It was like I popped the cork and let the sh** flow out!

My life began to shift once I began to feel my emotions, especially the upsetting ones. Mad, anger, resentful, sadness, shame, guilt…I was finally able to feel them all and let them flow from me instead of avoiding them.

Coincidently at this time I also became allergic to over the counter pain medication! Now I had to feel the pain…of my physical and emotional pain.

Do you ever find yourself skipping over your pain?

Do you ignore it, avoid it and stay busy to not experience it?

Do you medicate your emotional pain?

If you answered YES to any of these questions, know that you are not alone. It is part of our human conditioning to avoid pain AND if you desire to live a fulfilling and healthy life, it is necessary to feel ALL your emotions.

Here are some steps to support you in this process.

  1. When you feel a disturbance of your peace inside, your physiology is triggered. This is your indicator that some emotion is coming up. DON’T SKIP OVER THE FEELINGS!
  2. Stop what are doing, take a personal break from what you are doing and give yourself some space to inquire inside. STEP AWAY!
  3. Ask yourself, “What’s going on inside of me?” Don’t sugar coat it, ask for the truth and allow the emotion to come up. SEE THE TRUTH!
  4. Your feeling might be anger or sadness…both are very real and important feelings. If you are feeling the anger, grab a pen and paper and write down what is coming up for you. I call this “Free Form Writing” where you kinesthetically release your upset emotions on to the paper. You just write every dirty word, uncensored, raw and real words that want to come up.  DON’T REREAD WHAT YOU WROTE! This is a healthy release of upset emotions and and opportunity for you to tap into what’s really going on inside of you.
  5. As you release your anger, you might feel like crying.  LET YOUR TEARS FLOW! Your tears flow as a release from any emotion that may have been blocked. Don’t judge your crying as weak as it is imperative that you allow them to flow.
  6. Remember, don’t reread what you wrote in your Free Form Writing. Crumple up your paper and BURN IT IN A SAFE PLACE.
  7. Move to a place of love and compassion for yourself.  APPLY LOVING AND LIGHT to the parts that hurt.
  8. Repeat these steps as needed when you feel an upset inside. Your personal self-inquiry is so important as you will find out what’s really going on inside of you. FIND YOUR HEALTHY RELEASE!

The more you can identify and feel your upsetting emotions, the more you will be able to feel the good emotions like joy, happiness, fulfillment and love.

I use these tools in my life to support my mental, emotional and physical health. And there are still times that I find emotions5myself skipping over my feelings. I am blessed to work with an amazing coach and spiritual teacher who helps me see my blind spots when I’m unconsciously skipping over my pain.

I continue to do my own inner work and do my own self-inquiries about my feelings in my life.  As I do my own work, it strengthens me so I can support my clients and the people in my life.

To bring this poignant topic home, I am sharing more lyrics from Carly Simon’s song, “Haven’t Got Time For the Pain” that bring this full circle:

Suffering was the only thing that made me feel I was alive
Though that’s just how much it cost to survive in this world
’til you showed me how, how to fill my heart with love
How to open up and drink in all that white light
Pouring down from the heaven
I haven’t got time for the pain
I haven’t got room for the pain
I haven’t the need for the pain
Not since I’ve known you”

Fill your heart with self-compassion and love. “Open up and drink in all that white light pouring down from heaven.”

If this blog post touches your emotions and resonates with you, I’d love to hear your comments or questions in the comment section below.

If you desire more support in understanding more about your feelings, I invite you to call me so I can support you in finding more peace, happiness and fulfillment in your life.

Much love,

signature.chris_smaller

 

 

 

If you change nothing, then nothing will change.

On November 3rd I had the honor of facilitating a workshop at the YWCA Southern Arizona 27th Annual Leadership Conference.

It was such a powerful day inspiration, transformation and change opportunities for all the women who attended.sold out room YWCA

My workshop was about Emotional Intelligence at Work and I had room filled to capacity (and a few others snuck in and stood in the back of the room) with 87 women.

It was an awesome experience for me to fill a room!

What I heard from so many of these women was;

“I know I need to work on strengthening myself.”
“I know I need to work on my Emotional Intelligence skills.”
“I am always filled with anxiety and stress.”
“I want to learn how to connect with others better.”

Yet when I invited these women to a deeper conversation to support them, their fear kicked in and said, “no, not now.”

If not now, then when? If you change nothing, then nothing will change.

I know that it is not easy to take an honest look at your life. I know because I avoided taking a look at my life for a long time. In my busyaholic life, I didn’t have time to look at my life.

I denied that anything was wrong with me…..I was happy with my life……really, I was was happy with my life….really, every thing as ok. (You couldn’t see my pain inside from my mask on the outside!)

I was afraid of the truth, I knew it would hurt.

I was afraid of changing, I feared the unknown.

I was afraid of disappointing others, I didn’t want to hurt anyone.

Yet I do know that when I finally took an honest long look at my life, without judgement, I could see what wasn’t working. I could see what behaviors I needed to change. I could see that if I continued to deny my truth and my voice, than nothing would change.

If not now, then when? If you change nothing, then nothing will change.

If you know that some areas in your life need your attention, now is the time.  Not 10 years from now when your suffering has doubled (I’ve done that too!).

Today I live a radiant life.

I took 100% responsibility for my happiness and took the steps to create the life and work of my dreams. It took one step, and then another, and then another.

It begins with a commitment to a better life and the change inside that creates that.

Are you ready to stop thinking about change and ready to take action?

Is it time for you to step into your dream life?

NOW IS THE TIME.

Come join me to begin your New Year of 2016.
YOUR YEAR OF CHANGE!
I want to invite you say YES to yourself and join me at:

RADIANT LIVING INTENSIVE

Building Your Success Roadmap for 2016

Saturday January 23, 2016

Skyline Country Club, Tucson Arizona

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Registration begins next week, so get your name on the pre-registration list now!

Email me at christine@heartfeltworkforce.com 

I look forward to connecting with you and holding the sacred space for you to create your success roadmap for 2016!

Here’s to a radiant YOU in the New Year!

Much love and gratitude,

 

I am the one who chooses.

“Grace is perfect, even when my life isn’t.”  ~Deepak Chopra:

Manifesting Grace through Gratitude Meditation

Have you ever experienced a time when you felt like you were hit with one crisis after another?

As I consciously let go of more chaos, noise and clutter in my life, I am experiencing these “crises” differently.

While journaling in my morning pages last week, this poem came forward from me to write. I want to share it with you:

Life is filled with joys, sorrows, traumas and happiness. Each experience is in service for me to learn.

I am the one who chooses.

I choose how to experience it.

I choose to see the truth or the lie.Lesson 6 - powerful in all decision making

I choose to act or react.

I choose to see the lesson or the story.

I choose joy or sorrow.

I choose love or fear.

I choose to see the truth, the right action, the healing lesson, the joy and the love.

I have the power of my own choice.

I am the one who chooses.

Since I wrote this, I have been challenged with a few “crises” and came back to the poem as a powerful reminder of the choices I had.

I hope it supports you when your life isn’t perfect.

With much love and gratitude,

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In the silence, they heard.

In September last year, a small group of courageous women joined me in the pines of Flagstaff to listen to the Whispers of their Soul.

They were stressed out, over worked busy professional women who knew that something was missing in their lives.

Business deadlineThey thought that working harder would be the answer.  It wasn’t.

They thought that making more money was the answer.  It wasn’t.

They thought that they didn’t have time for a retreat. They found the time.

In the silence, they heard.

They opened their eyes, minds and hearts and asked themselves these questions in the silence of the majestic forest:

Who am I?

What do I desire?IMG_0879

What does my soul want me to know?

What is in the way from me creating my desires?

What is my next step?

In the silence, they heard.

They were astonished with the profound messages they heard from the intelligence of their heart and soul.  They heard their truth from deep inside themselves.

In the sacredness of the container of this retreat, they were able to listen to the whispers of their soul.

They trusted these messages and knew that it was imperative to trust this sacred and wisdom filled part of themselves and to take action in their lives to bring the peace and happiness they so desired.

In the silence, they heard.

Each one of these women’s lives has completely transformed since this retreat. By listening to their soul, releasing their blocks, and taking they action steps they committed to.

“Awaken to the Whispers of Your Soul: A Women’s Mountain Retreat” was a life altering experience for me personally. It was an intimate, soul-revealing journey into the discovery of the riches we all hold within ourselves, riches that ofkaren mercereau 2ten remain hidden, buried beneath years of “life’s little traumas” and the immediacy of our work lives. I came away knowing that this is a journey I have just begun, ready to continue to explore.”

~ Karen Mercereau, Founder/Executive Director RN Patient Advocates, PLLC

Say YES to yourself and the sacredness of this magnificent retreat to listen to the whispers of your soul.

In the silence, you will hear. 

Come join me and a group of like-minded women in my mountain home, in the cool pines of Flagstaff Arizona, June 26, 27 & 28 for a life altering weekend to unplug from your busy life of “doing” and slow way down to listen.

2015-banner-awaken-mtn-retreatSpace is limited for this powerful retreat. Spots are filling quickly so get yours NOW so you can take advantage of the SUPER EARLY BIRD PRICING before  March 15!!!

If you have a desire to be one of these 6 magnificent women who are ready to slow down to listen to the whispers of their soul, call me today.

I don’t want you to miss out on this experience to listen to the whispers of your soul and transform your life.

Much love,

Loving Yourself. Is it in Your Blind Spot?

Wow, what a question. Have you taken an honest look at your life recently to see if loving yourself is in your blind spot?blind spot

What you don’t see are the obstacles in the way from you truly loving and honoring yourself in your life.  That’s why it’s in your blind spot.

You might think that going to the gym, getting your mani and pedi and shopping might be acts of self-love.  But those are just the surface levels of love. Those are external forms of self-love.

The obstacles that are in the way might be a belief that you are unlovable, that came from your childhood.  Another obstacle might be your critical self that always sees what’s wrong with you. Perhaps one of your parents treated you that way.  And now you treat yourself that way.

Only you can change the behavior or pattern that is blocking your deep authentic love for yourself.

Yesterday I was in conversation with a woman about her experience around self-love.  She recently went to an event that allowed her to see her resentments in her life.  Unbeknownst to her, those resentments were an obstacle in her life.

She had an opportunity to look at her life and release the obstacles.  She was amazed at this awareness and then how she felt so much love for herself!  She felt a powerful shift from surviving to thriving in her life.  And then she asked me:

“Do you think we naturally love ourselves?”

I believe that at our core we are love. I believe that as we come into the world as beautiful precious babies we know that love. As we grow older and experience life’s pains and trauma, that innocence is lost and we forget that love.

Then what happens is that we consciously or unconsciously choose unloving behaviors towards ourselves.

inner critic messagesWe speak to ourselves with critical statements. That is unloving.

We look externally for love. The next relationship. The next car. That is unloving.

We make choices to please other people, even though we know inside its not a self honoring choice. That is unloving.

We fill our lives and calendars with so many activities. We say YES to everything. Then we over extend ourselves to exhaustion. That is unloving.

So the key to loving yourself is to become consciously aware of your relationship you have with yourself. Slow down. Spend some time with yourself and reflect inside.

The more you unlearn the unloving behaviors, patterns and actions, then you can learn to create a more loving relationship with yourself, with behaviors that are self-honoring and self-loving.

The love is naturally there. The key is to move into that loving that is always there.

“Loving yourself…does not mean being self-absorbed or narcissistic, or disregarding others. Rather it means welcoming yourself as the most honored guest in your own heart, a guest worthy of respect, a lovable companion.” ~ Margo Anand

If you are ready to take a look at your life, call me.  You deserve to be the most honored guest in your own heart!

Much love,

chris-signature

Your Comfort Zone. Are You Ready to Move Beyond?

Who in their right mind would want to be uncomfortable?  Isn’t comfort where you want to be all the time?  Knowing exactly what will happen in your life, doing the same thing, day in and day out…..now that’s comforting.  But is it really?

Being safe and comfortable can be important to your happiness, but when you live in your comfort zone ALL the time, you really don’t grow and have new experiences.

Do you do the SAME workout every week and are wondering why you are not getting any results?  Do you have the SAME arguments with your partner and nothing changes?  Do you question yourself if you are in the right job because you do the SAME thing every day and you don’t excited about the work you do?

It’s time to step out of your comfort zone if you want different results!

Most times, it is fear of the unknown that can hold you back. You know you might want something different, but you are afraid of what can happen if you change. What would happen if you stepped out of your comfort zone?  What would happen if you moved into something that is uncomfortable? What would it look like if you trusted and surrendered that you would be ok?

When you take action and move into the steps to where you want to be, it WILL be uncomfortable.  Trust and surrender.  This is the place where you grow and transform.

Ready to step out of my comfort zone in my GoLoco Jersey!

Recently I came into an awareness about myself with my comfort zone and my cycling workouts.  I was really wishy washy with my workouts.  I didn’t like going anywhere other than my regular route.  I did NOT like it when my husband took a different route. I WAS UNCOMFORTABLE!

In my own self reflection of my commitments to myself, this was standing out to me as a place where I wanted different results and it was time for me to step into my fear and my uncomfortableness.

I made a commitment to myself to step into my fear.  This past weekend, instead of my usual easy 20 mile ride on the same route, I made a commitment to a different route that I had not been on before, and to complete a 40 mile route around my community.  As I stepped into my fear, I remembered my commitment to MYSELF and the changes I wanted. I surrendered to the unknown.

I rode the entire route with this message in my head (and my heart) and YES, I WAS UNCOMFORTABLE.  And I completed the 40 miles and found a new route with a different view of the city! 

It may have been uncomfortable at first, and I know the more I take this new route with my commitment to myself, that it will become more comfortable each time.  And when it becomes too comfortable, it will be time for a new route, with a new goal.

This experience reminds me of a quote I read last week from my beloved mentor and professor at the University of Santa Monica:

“The most comfortable place you could ever live is outside of your comfort zone, because it is the only place where you are going to find growth. It is the only place you are going to rise up and continue to lift into higher states of consciousness and move more and more into trust, into surrender.”  – Ron Hulnick

What is your experience with stepping into the uncomfortable in your life?  How did it feel?  I’d love to hear from you and how your experience was…or is!   Share your comments below!

Much love + light,

 

6 Empowering Steps to Build Your Inner Freedom

When you look at your life, what do you need to let go of?  What drains your power on a regular basis?  Does it bring you suffering?

Are you ready to take the steps to release it and feel the peace inside?

You may find yourself all knotted up when you think about what you should let go of in your life.  It could be toxic people, old beliefs, hurts from the past, anger and resentment, emotional weight or even self defeating behaviors.  When you take some quality reflective time, you will discover exactly what it is you need to release from your life.

At one time or another, I had all of the above hanging on to me.  I have been blessed to have experience the pain (yes, blessed) because it moved me action to find better solutions to my pain.  In my own life journey, I have learned the following steps that have helped me find my own inner peace:

1.  Take the quiet time to go inside and reflect.  Be honest with yourself and look to see what it is that you are ready to let go of.

2.  Write down what it is, relationships, hurts, behaviors, etc.  Acknowledge it in writing.  Take a look at it.

3.  Build your resource team to help you let go, support you, keep you accountable and celebrate with you when you have released. This could be a trusted friend, therapist or coach.

4.  Create your action plan and move into it.  One step at a time. Be courageous and vulnerable.

5.  Acknowledge yourself every step of the way of your release.  It may be simple and quick or it may take some time.  Be patient and loving to yourself along the way.

6.  Keep reminding yourself that every self honoring choice moves you closer to your inner peace and freedom.

You will find this letting go process very self empowering and freeing.  And here is the best part of the letting go process….

You can bring what you truly desire into your life now.  Bring on all the goodness!

I know that I’m ready to let go of procrastinating about writing my blogs and videos!  I’m ready to let go of that perfectionist voice in my head that says its not good enough.  I’m not a perfectionist because I’m always a work in progress!

How about you?  What are you ready to let go of?  I’d love to hear about what you are ready to let go of in the comment section below. Remember when you declare it, you make it real!!!

Much love and light,

 

 

 

 

Transform to a New YOU for the New Year

As the New Year is upon us, for many it is a time for a new start.  A clean slate.  Out with the old and in with the new.  Time for a fresh start with new intentions, goals and resolutions. (Personally, I like using the word “intention” instead of resolution.  It has more energy and power!)

It is easy to get caught up in the same old, “I will start my exercise program”….”I will lose weight”…..I will take my vitamins”.  It seems that most of us set New Year’s Intentions that are focused on our physical or mental body.

How about a New Year’s intention that supports your Emotional and Spiritual Self?

These are significant areas in your life that are easy to skip over and forget. However, supporting your emotional and spiritual self can transform your way of being.  Yes, your way of being.  Who you are inside.  Your heart and soul, not just the funny body you happen to live in.

Here are some suggestions of New Year’s Intentions that will support your inner growth:

1.   I will consciously do at least 5 random acts of kindness a week.

2.   I will spend 5 minutes a day in quiet and stillness.

3.   I will spend time in nature at least 3 times a week.

4.   I will pay attention to my thoughts and when they are negative, I will shift them to positive thoughts with affirmations.

5.   I will take of my upsets and process them inside, instead of projecting them on someone else.

6.   I will end each day with gratitude in my heart for all my experiences that day.

7.   I will consciously do one joy filled activity a day to honor my love and respect for me.

Some of these intentions can be very simple if you are consciously aware of your actions and behaviors.  Setting intentions to change your way of being  can be very powerful for you and how you show up in your world.

Add just a few of these suggestions to your list of New Year’s Intentions and you will see changes in how you feel about yourself.  And most amazingly, the people around you will see and feel a difference in you.

Do you have any New Year’s Intentions that support your inner growth? 

Have you ever made these changes in your way of being and experiences a new you?  I’d love to hear from you!  Share in the comment section below.

Wishing you a Blessed, prosperous and life changing 2013!

Much love and light,

Your Power: Authentic or Egoic?

“Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom.
Mastering others is strength; mastering yourself is true power.”
~Lao-Tzu~

When do you feel powerful?  When you feel confident and in your integrity?  Or when you feel smarter, better and “above” someone else?

I was part of a table top discussion with some professional women this week and we were asked, “when do you feel powerful?”   It was very insightful to hear the different perspectives of what the word meant to them.

Most of these ladies shared that they felt empowered when they were in their integrity, knowledge, mastery, authentic self and being of service to help others.

Their power came from within.

When they made honoring choices that aligned with their value system, they became powerful within themselves.  They also strengthened their inner power when:

  • When they didn’t accept poor behavior from others.
  • When they said ‘no’ to things that didn’t serve them.
  • When they made choices that weren’t popular, but they were the right thing to do.

Their power, integrity and self-respect were obvious to others.

However it was interesting that some ladies were turned off by the word “powerful” and felt negative emotions towards the word.  Not knowing their past experiences, perhaps they had (or still have) someone in their life who has power over them.  Everyone’s perceptions are different and come from their past experiences and beliefs systems.

It’s easy to give your power up to someone else.  When you own your power, no one can take it from you.  That is true authentic power, not egoic power.

About ten years ago, I didn’t fully understand my own personal power.  Since then, after years of conscious reflection and healing, I can see clearly how I used to give up my power.  Now I know the difference and own my inner power.  My life’s lessons have helped me learn this.  You too, can reflect and make different choices in your life about your power.

Take a look at your life.  Do you live your life aligned with your value system?  Do you know your value system?  Do you strive to live in your integrity every day?  When do you feel powerful or empowered?  

I would love to hear from you in the comment section below about when you feel powerful or empowered.  Easy, simple.  I’d love to know. Thanks for sharing!

Much love and light,